My beloved Mary Sack

The last message I sent her just said “fuck toy,” because I knew it would make her smile. She had recently sent me a picture of herself, saying that if anyone said she looked good she’d say fuck you. I attempted to answer her text in the middle of the night when I was sleepy and I somehow managed to misspell ‘fuck you’ as ‘fuck toy.’ This amused her greatly. So not long after when I sent her a message I ended it with ‘fuck toy.’ Actually it probably wasn’t the last message, I think I sent a follow up ‘just checking in’ kind of thing when she didn’t respond. When there was no response to that I knew things were getting bad. I talked to her beloved Ed a few days ago and he told me they were at the hospice stage. I got off the phone and cried.

Yesterday, Mary’s sister posted on Facebook that she had passsed. My utterly beloved force of nature friend who lit up the sky, Mary Sack, is gone.

Fucking cancer.

I’m hoping the brilliant photographer JOHN PARTIPILO is ok with me using this. Every great photo I found of her and Olney was by him. It is clear that he loved them both.

I first knew Mary through David Olney, as she was his manager guide dog extraordinaire. Mary worked with many, many, MANY musicians that we admired. If there was indeed a golden age of Americana based around East Nashville, it could not have happened without Mary’s brilliance, energy and love. I’m not sure when I first met her in person, maybe in Nashville when we went down to see David Olney play, with RB Morris opening for him. We instantly connected and recognized each other as kindred spirits, as different as we were.

Mary came up to Champaign to do a bourbon tasting when she was working for Green Briar Distillery back in 2017.

One of my favorite pictures of all time is the one of me with Mary after David Olney’s memorial in Nashville. We really did love each other that much.

Later, when a group of friends got together to hold a benefit for us when Ernie wasn’t doing too well and I was having a few issues of my own, Mary Sack helped to create the most wonderful event ever with beloved artists, Rod Picott, RB Morris, Greg Horne, and BARK (Tim Lee and Susan Bauer Lee). She came for the event as well. Here’s an extremely rare photo of her sitting still.

Mary, next to Ernie

I know this video is dark but if you let your eyes adjust you can see Mary, back at the merch table, dancing away to RB Morris.

Somewhere there’s a 10 second clip of her dancing across the floor at the 5 Spot that I really love but I can’t find it. Here’s a great shot with Irakli Gabriel though.

We became closer after David’s death and then even more so after the loss of Mark Gerking who was a dear friend of hers. If we were going through something difficult a little surprise package would show up in the mail complete with new music, silly games and random stickers. She would call me periodically and I would be treated to the whirlwind of her thoughts and creativity and current life.

I last saw her in March. We didn’t talk nearly enough. I’d hoped to see her again.

I loved her.

One of many. One of oh so many.

My heart goes out to her siblings but most of all, to her beloved Ed. And to all that loved her.

Damn it, Mary.

I miss you already.

This one really hurts and it makes me angry. I’ll accept it eventually, but not yet.

Onward.

Love,
Cynthia